Fresh From The Betty Ford Clinic



Wow. So I slept from 3 p.m. yesterday afternoon until 6:47 a.m. this morning. I feel fanfuckingtastic! My liver was tappin' out because from last Thursday until yesterday I had drank to black out / tears /mega-bad hangover 3 times. Thats B A D. I spent all of last Friday at work running to the toilet to puke at least once every twenty minutes. I woke up for work still drunk. Wednesday night of this week I lost my f'n mind and I realized I have no control. I got 4 hours of sleep after a raging-lunatic-scream-fest on my part. (Sorry to all those who had to look after me and deal with my insanity). I dunno. I think I need to chill out for a lil while on drinking...either that or maybe I should stop drinking 2 half and half pint glasses of gatorade and absolut in an hour...after three drinks at the bar before that. Cinco de Mayo is coming so there is prolly a tequilla-fueled bootfest in my near future. I dunno, I feel mad guilty about all of this and I don't think I even did anythign *that* wrong. Hmmm...

On a happier note: I gave work defintive notice that I'm leaving July 30th to be back at school full time. Thats a Friday so you all better be ready to get into the city to get your kareoke/dance/party on to celebrate my freedom. The aggrivation of this job: gone. The decent pay check: gone (which sucks) but I'll be able to make it. Its an interesting day, kids.

Ganked! 'Cause I'm Lazy

Famous former porn king,Gary O. prompted me to post useless facts from retro stats again. Here is what people searched for in April and found me. (I've highlighted the entertaining ones):

don diva
hoes
scatting
pavel burre (I realize its bure)
don and diva
concept of odd and even illusion
mechanical bitches Umm....what?
twizzlers
don & diva
2fast 2 furious tazz
who wants a moustache ride?
don diva bitch
the te of piglet quotes
electric youth perfume
teen bitches
hot tinis sex pictures I hope this wasn't a misspelling of hot & tiny or some derivation thereof
hip picks
how to make blu raspberry martinis
songs into the nigth
hip picks mary kate and ashley olson
don't cry jonnie
dynamite
video paris hilton
illusion of odd and even numbers
mike tyson april 2004 Is there a new tyson story I'm missing...I hope not!
desk ecospheres
jealous bitches graphics Why exactly would you need these?
ikea merchandizing
condums in schools
coral from the real world new york pics
labia
lingus
liz's labia Thats wrong, people! She's his SISTER!
recipe for cum Wow...just wow.
hypercolor clothing
the illusion of odd and even numbers
manhattan black bitches
what happened to don diva
november kills
coral and the reality bar crawl
bear costume
dapper don death cause
john corbet
gwen
reeses big cup
illusion concept of odd and even
rubber band man song Most.annoying.song.ever
winy de poo sex See number one: um...What?!?
mars resturant nyc
dateing bitches

Smileworthy

So here it is, April 28th, why did I make a big deal about this approaching? Simple: The 3 Month Curse is finally broken! What is the 3 month curse: well you see of my last 3 boyfriends (or attempts at re-dating old boyfriends) I've had this problem where before we can make it to the 3 month mark in our relationships I just lose interest or discover my feelings were different than I'd thought or in some extreme cases I find that they make my skin crawl and stomach turn and they're just generally deadbeat dirtbags (see March to May-ish of last year's archives). I've finally found a guy though, who is:

a) my own age
b) local (as in only 5 mins away)
c) employed
d) cute
e) not on drugs (illegal or prescription)
f) not from the internet
g) knows me as Deja and not Gwen
h) did I mention cute?
this isn't meant as a slam to the exes...only one of you was a dirtbag/druggie/loser at life

So, Andrew, thank you for a very fun 3 months and I hope we can continue to enjoy many more 'cause you're stuck with me now :p

Happy 67th Brithday

I hope they give him A nice cake with A naked lady on it something with yellow cake and some nice betty crocker frosting cause i dont liek that profesinal cake frosting im sure neither does uncle saddam

man I really wanted a birthday ckae this year I never got one

Victim Of A Foolish Heart

"Your scars were still showing when I first met you, baby, from all she had done to you. And I came along and applied a little loving. Slowly, but surely I brought you through. Now she's back to rekindle that old flame. She's got a different angle, baby, but she's playing the same old game. Baby, don't be the victim of a foolish heart. Don't let her lies get next to you. She's trying to tear us apart and she's trying to make me a victim too. Now I know she comes around here every time I leave, 'cause she knows she's still on your mind. See, even a wiseman jumps in misery somewhere down the line, but only a fool will jump the second time. Our affair is growing stronger every day, don't let her steal our happiness away. Don't be the victim of a foolish heart. Don't let her lies get next to you. Can't you see what she's doing to you, boy? Don't be a victim." ~ j. stone

Joss Stone is really rockin' my world these days. Her and iTunes are where it seems to be at.

Entering the Home Stretch

In approximately 15 and a half hours it will be April 28th. Who cares, well, I care. I'll let you know after it happens, but lets just hope I make it. In exactly 15.5 hours it will be 2 months until my birthday. Get ready to get your party on, childrens. I'm thinking a bar crawl spectacular...details to come later.

Everything was pretty fun this weekend. I enjoyed a yummy dinner with my fellow angels Farrah & Lucy and afterwards we all hung at Finn's for a bit. Saturday the weather was absolutely AMAZING. The boy and I headed out to Long Island and saw his new puppy, Harley, who is the CUH YOO TEST thing I have ever seen. Dinner at Black Bear wasn't as good as it usually was because we had the biggest crackpot of a waiter. I watched Kill Bill again (to think I'd almost forgotten just how HARD it rocked my ass the first time!) and I'm highly anticipating getting out to see part 2 this week or weekend. The sun is shining again today, there are just a few more hours to go and I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I'm gonna leave you guys with a good song (no, there is no hidden meaning behind it...it was just the last thing I heard on my way outta the house this morning and this blog needs more Goldfinger!)

"I run away
'Cause I'm scared that you might leave
There's nothing wrong,
But that's not what I believe.
Just tell me it's alright
And tell me I'm okay
And tell me that you're
Staying here tonight.

I feel stupid saying
Words you've heard before.
The way I feel today
Is all I know for sure
And if I scare you
I'm only scaring me.
I've got so much to say
Why won't you speak with me?
I need to know

What you're feeling
Do you feel like I do?
Let's talk about everything,
I want to share my life with you
And tell me that you feel
The way I feel tonight
And tell me that you know
This feels right

If you're in my life
Well I want to be sure
I'm not wasting time
I've been through this before"

Hellow World theres a Song that im Singing

Come on Get IDUCKS

Holy Quack
me want them
256MB Duck Flash sticks and when they are plugged in THEY LIGHT UP
If I was a girl with a vagian it woudl be oooozingly moist
like Porn star Moist Aids free

THE PINCH POT MUDWORKS LIVES

This is my 3rd proudest moment wiht the Phase "Pinch Pot Mudworks" behind the first time it got on the radio and then the second time when it refered to dolphin sex
now people click on the clink and make it top rated turd word

Rhino Tries To Sex up a Car

When i Get that Feeling I Want Some Rhino Healing

Life Lesson # 2,348

When you have a 9 a.m. meeting its probablly best NOT to mix chinese food, one blue mermaid glass drink, 2 Malibu Baybreezes, 1/2 a pitcher of Labatt's Blue and a Molson XXX. While 6 drinks is not that much, the chinese food was the crazy x-factor that lead to me driving home at 2 a.m. confused and sad (though I'm not sure there was anything to be confused or sad about), getting upset over a miscommunication amongst friends and then waking up at 6 a.m. and puking everywhere. Its almost 7 a.m. now, I still feel drunk, I can't call out, I don't want to eat anything. All I can do is pray that I can get the consultant out of the building by noon and use comp time I earned by going to last night's meeting to come home and try and recover. Ugh. Please put a bullet in my head....thats only in tha mawnin'

Happy Earth Day

Brazil's rainforest continues to shrink

"An ocean of concern

but good news The EPA said dropped a proposal to temporarily ease rules on gasoline sulfur content

And This is jsut a side of rice Missing Fuel Rod

The Passion of the Matt

I haven't posted in a while so I figered I sholdl show all a photo of my Freind matt looking all Jesusie Enjoy

All Smiles For Today

Great weekend. Amazing weather, could have done with a few less fights, but I got to meet Coral from the Real World New York and David from the Real World Seattle (Holy Hotness, Batman!) as part of this Reality Bar Crawl thing that was going on. It was a fun night, Bex and I rocked out, saw an imposter who was a dead ringer from the side, saw 2 bar fights and got our drank on. Good times.

The boy came back from Canada and it was *so* good too see him. His birthday present also came in while he was away so, though its almost a month late, he finally got it. Got to talk lots with Bill, got to clear the air with a few people, got a lot of work done around the house, just generally starting to feel good again. Billy also explained to me the funniest thing I've probably heard in a long time. He explained the wonder that is the Angry Pirate. Good times, childrens, good times.

Its Fate

Stolen from Jonnie. I would also like to say I didn't even know this show was a choice, so its fucking fate. LOVE IT.


You are CLARISSA EXPLAINS IT ALL. She is a rad
chick with absolutely no fashion sense. If you
are a guy and chose this... you are gay.


Which old school Nickelodeon show are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Le Sigh

My boyfriend has really delicious lips. They're those rare boy lips that are actually quite full and voluptuous as opposed to your standard, run-of-the-mill, thin, lizard boy lips. They're lips that look really amazing and inviting when they're pouty, though he very rarely ever pouts. They're the kind of lips that are fun to trace the outline of with your tounge and give a quick nibble to as we break our kiss. Wether its an innocent brush of them against my forehead or somewhere a bit more naughty, they make me shiver. They're these really cute lips that when he speaks sometimes give him what sounds like a lisp, but isn't and can make even a mumble of nonsense sound sexy. I feel like sometimes our lips are magnetic becuase they always seem to be locked together. I can lie in bed with him for hours just kissing with him becuase his lips are that good. Sometimes we'll press our foreheads to one another and share a quick smooch and then he'll cock his head back and open his mouth revealing his equally as nice teeth and he'll just laugh and squeeze me to him. In those moments, things are so perfect, that I feel like I could die.

Friday!

Happy Friday, boys & girls! I hope that the lovely weather of the last day has cheered us all up a little bit, I know its helped for me. I've been pretty busy the last few days trying to tie up some loose ends with UConn stuff, considering a change of departments at work, some craziness on the friend front (as I'm sure you all saw from my last stoopit posts), seeing the boy off to Canada for the weekend for his hockey tournament and just generally trying to preserve my mental health.

I've lost 5 pounds, so I'm feeling happy about that, the sun is back to shining, I've spent some well needed time with my kitties these last few days and I'm painting my boring white walled room this weekend. Its gonna be periwinkle-ish with a bright purple focus wall. I've also commissioned the boy to repaint my snowboard deck (I finally settled on a design...photos will come when its done) and make some art for my focus wall at home. Unfortunately he's CRAZY allergic to kitties and seeing as I have six he can't come over and acutally paint a mural on my wall like I had wanted, but we're gonna take 4 big canvases and have him paint on those and then hang them, it will rock your socks of when you see the pics!

I want to say Happy Birthday to the lovely Missy (even though it was yesterday). I hope it was a good day and you got lots of strappy heels and cute dresses to get you through this next year (c:

Thats gonna do it for me today, but if you can get out and enjoy the sunshine your brain will thank you.

Hey look at this thing I made that nobody cares about cause it doesn't make sence but I say it just looks pretty

>

Right, Thanks

When I go to bat for you to try and help you and you know I'm going to do it and you don't tell me the truth and make me look like a fucking liar to people who are telling the truth thats really shitty and messed up. So, yeah, thanks for being my friend. Next time I hope you'll wash the blood off from last time before stabbing the knife into my back again. I don't want your drama.

Vocabulary Lesson

Children please open your notebooks to a fresh sheet of paper and copy down the following new vocabulary words no one seems to know yet, noting key differences between the 2 words:

fiend    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (fnd)
n.
1. An evil spirit; a demon.
2. The Devil; Satan.
3. A diabolically evil or wicked person.
4. Informal. One who is addicted to something: a dope fiend.

friend    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (frnd)
n.
A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.
A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.

One of the key differences is the letter "r". "R" can be found in such other words like retarded, really (as in really stupid) and ridiculous. We'll delve into words like that another day though, students.

It seems to me nothign is any different today than any other day of the last 3 months except that everyone now knows I can't keep a secret and thinks that I am lying, ha! My last bit of advice to you all is this: if you get shown the light but are too blinded by it to move out of it, don't cry to me when you get burned by it. Also get a fucking STD test if you're not using condoms you're just asking for a super stinging new strain of the clap.

Scatting is so 5 minets ago?

In the new ET Weekly Thats entertianment Weekly IT says Scatting is So 5 minets Ago btu you know what i say to that

Scoobly scoobly do wop bo shangity scoobly soocbly boo Wahhhhhhhh and shoo be do do do ba do whaa

Whistling will never be in i wont accept it shaw report i jsut wont

Fin

Important Breaking News ! ! !

BackStreets back ALRIGHT
The Backstreet Boys WIll now be the Backstreet Men

p.s. That IS the Awesomest Picture ever Authur and the Backstreet Boys Men

Happy Easter



with love form Diva And Don

Sheep Gone Wild

Show your HOOOOVES

Yeah, UConn!


Okay so the UConn men are the NCAA Champs, now we just have to see if the Ladies can beat Tennessee tonight (a much tougher opponent than Georgia Tech), to make the goold old UC the first team in NCAA history to have the men and women as champions in the same year.

If they're already rioting now, imagine what would happen if the ladies do win...

Most Offensive Song Inspiration

**Warning: I'm sure this is really offensive to a lot of people, but I in no way condone this and I can't believe it actually exists, and I'm not a racist and I hope there is some explanation for it from the homeowner, but I'm too skeered to ask.**

Okay, so my friend Billy and I walk around these nice, quiet little neighborhoods to get exercise and try and get in shape. Friday on our walk we stumble upon this house with a swingset in the front yard and sitting on the swingset is what appears to be (and judge for yourself) a stuffed KKK baby. I did not make this up, photoshop it or anything, it just sits out there, I photographed it today because no one would beleive either of us if we just said we saw it. Billy said maybe it was supposed to be a ghost baby for Halloween or something, but its just one of those things that sometimes you just need to see to believe.

All The Small Things...

It doesn't really seem like much, but when play is stopped in your game and you signal to my friend to tell me about an inside joke that we have with each other it, literally makes me smile *so, so* much. Thank you for dealing with my insanity and then getting up to hit the snooze for me twice and suffering through the alarm 4 times in a morning instead of just one. (Also, you're really hot).

Holla For HellBoy

yeah so I never ever ever ever EVER see a movie opening weekend cause i hate poeple they always ruin shit and I freak out but my Friend chuck was like hey wanna see Hellboy and i said i've been dieing to see this for 10 months so i went And Fully Fully Enjoyed ..The End

Thats my story if you want to learn more about it Don't take my word for it go to the libary ehhh no wait do take my word for it go see Hellboy and if you dont like it suck my left nut

p.s. Look for the White Chicks Trialor Alone its NegroTastical

License & Registration, Chicken Fucker!



Congratulations, Billy! He passed his Police test with a 90%! Now we've gotta kick up the working out so you can pass the physical and you'll be a cop in no time. Now, who wants a moustache ride?

Why You shoudl be Wathcing WonderFalls


This Quote From Tonight Episode
"Im a Puppet.....
The Universe sticks its hand up my Butt and if i dont dance i get hurt"

P.s. unrelated but Concept of odd and even numbers is a philosphical illusion because we declare one thing as odd and its oppisite even so we decided to create a notion or mathmatically speaking if you add two odd numbers together you get an even number except .5 which is odd plus .5 which is also odd is one which is odd so it breaks down

P.s. I liek dooing the p.s. thing

p.s. okay this is related I love the girl who stars in wonderfalls shes adoobly

Whats the Deal With Superman and Jerry Seinfeld and

There Aparntly in a Gay Relationship???

So Have you been Seeing the weird comericals where Superman and Jerry are hanging out then Jerry gets a call from Green Lantern and Superman Doesn't want to talk to him then they tell you to find out the whole story by going to Ameriicanexpress.com/jerry

Anywho Well I did it and Im Highly Confused
Superman and Jerry are Dateing?

p.s. get it the title started with whats the deal

Goodbye, Mess!



Last night I went to Madison Square Garden to watch Mark Messier's last home game of his career. Although the Rangers lost (surprise, surprise) it was still a really awesome game. The last five minutes the crowd started to get really nuts and the whole place pretty much was on their feet. There was the "Mess-i-er" cheers and lots and lots of screaming. Finally, after the game Mess came out and bowed and thanked the crowd, shed a few tears. It was really an amazing night. Hard to recap the energy and emotion of the situation.

After that we (me, Andrew, Jimmy, Margaret, Todd, Vicki & her friend and the Senator) headed to Play by Play for some drinks. Todd made some sort of hot sauce, bud light, mustard nugget concoction and acutally drank it (ew!) and then we had a round of TRIPLE SoCo and Lime shots. On the train ride home Andrew made a passing comment that something was "glorious" and the guys behind us start trading Old School lines with him. It was pretty funny to say the least. A great night all around.

So here I am, home for the day becuase I have a "sinus headache", but I think I'm finally gonna get my ass to UConn and try and sort some things out.